The Fluffbucket Diaries

I know yesterday was Ash Wednesday.

Finally had some time to reflect on the Lenten season ahead. It’ll be another day or two before I write about it. A “hot take” on a holy time is not something to strive for.

Five years later, I finally noticed the Franklin Pierce coin at the bottom of this. He looks like Bill Gates. Or Larry King.

Final Fat Tuesday carb count: 148 grams of carbs. I’m supposed to consume less than 100 grams each day, as prescribed by my doctor.

(But I was under my protein, fat, and caloric limits, as prescribed by the MyFitnessPal app.)

This carb overload marked only the second or third day in more than a month that I’ve gone over my limit. It was by far the most carbs I’ve consumed in a single day since I saw the bariatric doctor last month.

Splurged on 1.75 paczki — that’s 0.75 more paczki than I planned to eat. Plus I had sips of Chris’ frozen hurricane and bottled mojito.

But I still opted for half a plate of steamed veggies, a “stick” of chicken satay, and a couple of spoonfuls of basil chicken — which included a generous amount of green beans — at dinner. I was short about 2 servings of vegetables (not counting the greens powder in the morning smoothie), but I still avoided the brown rice and noodle dishes.

Frankly, I didn’t want to eat the rice and noodles; I’ve gotten used to the healthier, carb-free eating, plus the dinner I had was much more satisfying (and guilt-free). And I’m delighted that I have a decent strategy now for our local Thai takeout place.

It’s the eve of Ash Wednesday, and I still haven’t nailed down how I’ll observe Lent.

I did spend some time this afternoon tinkering with YouTube to remove suggestions for “Big Bang Theory” clips from my feed there. It dawned on me recently that I’ve frittered away an awful lot of time the past few weeks mindlessly clicking on “Big Bang” clips to distract me from my various anxieties. The show has become comfort food for me, with particularly empty calories. And I’ve gained a lot of suffocating weight.

So, I’m done with “Big Bang” on YouTube for Lent. There’s that. It’s not much. But it’s a start.

The grease spots make Paczki Day official. The spots also tell me that Fat Tuesday means I can throw carb counts to the wind today. (And just today.)

As I suspected, the enormous weight loss logged yesterday was wrong. As of this morning, I’m only down 2 pounds. That makes a lot more sense, given how I haven’t done anything drastically different with my eating and activity habits.

The trajectory is still downward – I’m now down 15.8 pounds, or 5.6 percent of my weight when I began all this – so I’m fine with even the smaller loss. A 10-pound drop within a week at this point was alarming.

(I thought about deleting the post with the errant reading, but I’ll leave it. Doesn’t hurt to keep a record of oddities like that, and there’s an update on it, anyway.)

I may well blow any readings out of the water today, as it’s Fat Tuesday and I’ve already logged the calories and carbs for anticipated paczki consumption. Just having one half of two different packzis; the total will account for nearly half my carbs today.

But then tomorrow being Ash Wednesday, I’ll be minimal and meatless with any food intake a day later. Maybe it’ll all even out, God willing.

Welp, a quickie look at the scale this afternoon said I’m closer to last week’s weight after all. I’ll check it again tomorrow morning; if it turns out I’m vastly different than where I allegedly was earlier today, I’ll tweak the weight progress in my app.

When you pick up dog paczki in the dead of winter, you come across dachshunds carved in ice.

“Frannie, you don’t have to wear your mask in the car.”

“I know. But it keeps me warm.”

#8degreesofwinter

The scale says I lost another 10.6 pounds this past week. It seems odd, I know, to be on the verge of complaining, but I am wary of this amount of loss for two reasons: (1) I don’t feel like I did anything that different last week, and (2) A sizable weight loss like this 5 weeks in seems a little alarming.

Before this morning, I had weighed myself sporadically during the week and saw a 1- or 2-pound loss here and there. My daily step count still rarely goes past 2,000. (I’m supposed to be aiming for 10,000 steps per day.) And I’ve only worked out a couple of times, mainly over the weekend, this past week. So, today’s scale reading is a surprise.

This amounts to 24.2 pounds gone since the doctor limited me to 100 grams of carbs a day, among other things.

Maybe treating myself to a little paczki tomorrow for Fat Tuesday won’t be that big a deal after all.

Update (5:38 p.m. Central): I weighed myself in the afternoon and found my weight much closer to last week’s numbers. I’ll weigh myself tomorrow morning; if I end up at a vastly different weight than the one I saw this morning, I’ll tweak my records.

CCD was canceled today; the schedule conflicted with a medical appointment for the teacher.

Given my mindset lately, part of me was kind of relieved. But it’s also unfortunate to not have church class for F just before Lent starts.

I’ve been on a low-carb regimen since early last month per doctor’s orders. And I’ve been following it pretty faithfully.

My next appointment with the doctor is later this month. I hope he’ll forgive me for calling in a paczki order today for Fat Tuesday.

Today’s social media memory.

Maybe for Lent, I can give up social media. Maybe instead, I can write here every day.

Forty-plus days away from Catholic Twitter and Catholic Instagram, among other platforms, could only be restorative.

I moved to North Carolina in 1993 because of what ultimately was an ill-advised relationship. I got a new newspaper job, moved on to one of the first dedicated news sites on the Internet, and left in 1996 for Chicago.

In many ways, my years in Raleigh were awkward, but I appreciated many of the old school journalists there. One was Mike Yopp, who I learned passed away recently. He taught me a lot about newspapering in North Carolina, and gracefully endured my California transplant ignorance of the South.

When I edited a Sunday section and suggested running a wire story about Alabama in it, he frowned and shook his head. “No, that’s the DEEP South,” he said with a hint of disdain about the topic. “We don’t cover that.”

It’s people like Mike who made Raleigh memorable, and I’m grateful for that.

Ezra Klein in The New York Times about our home state:

There is a danger — not just in California, but everywhere — that politics becomes an aesthetic rather than a program. It’s a danger on the right, where Donald Trump modeled a presidency that cared more about retweets than bills. But it’s also a danger on the left, where the symbols of progressivism are often preferred to the sacrifices and risks those ideals demand. California, as the biggest state in the nation, and one where Democrats hold total control of the government, carries a special burden. If progressivism cannot work here, why should the country believe it can work anywhere else?

Lent is coming, and I’m frankly not very excited about it. Disenchanted with a lot of Church-related things right now. But not necessarily with God-related things. There’s a bit of a difference, as far as I’m concerned.

The Catholic far right has ruined a lot for me. Tired of it.

Down another 2.2 pounds this week. I confess that I weighed myself a second time this morning after emptying myself, as it were, and I logged that (larger) amount of weight lost.

Still not increasing my activity level as much as I’m supposed to be. But I’m still burning more calories than I’m consuming. Doesn’t matter; I still need to get off my ass, even if only for 10 minutes at a time.

Although I’m only 13.6 pounds lighter than I was when I started all this January 11, I’m feeling better physically. Climbing stairs doesn’t leave me aching as much, and my pelvic floor pain isn’t as chronic. My lower back isn’t getting much better—it feels worse some mornings—but maybe more exercise will help that.

If I could lose 10 pounds a month, I’d lose a whole person by Thanksgiving. That would be nice—but I expect plateaus and stalling between now and then. I remain in it for the long haul.

It’s almost noon Saturday and it’s 11 degrees out. I have a drive-up Target order to retrieve. Between the deep freeze and my gut feeling iffy at the moment, I’d just as soon stay home. #benignexistence

Stalker.

Here’s a point in this article that isn’t made enough: “The United States currently has among the highest rates of child poverty in the developed world, a trend exacerbated by the coronavirus pandemic.”

Second straight day without a salad. Less cranky this time.

I shouldn’t get used to this, as it’s the best way for me to get the 3 to 4 cups of fruits and vegetables I’m supposed to have each day. I will start anew tomorrow.

I totally live to hear references to the filioque dispute over the Nicene Creed on late night TV. Or, if you’re gonna get fussy about it, the Niceno-Constantinopolitan Creed.

If it turns out that my lousy day and wretched mood are linked to the fact that I didn’t have a salad today, I’m going to be really pissed off.

It could explain, though, most of the past 20 to 30 years.

Dropped another 2.2 pounds this past week. Wasn’t expecting that much, frankly; I felt like I was slacking, or maybe this all is beginning to feel routine. Not that that’s a bad thing.

Honestly, I like the healthy regularity of the past few weeks: Most days, it’s a matcha kefir smoothie for breakfast, a high-protein lunch, and a big salad with a reasonable portion of protein and small portion of carbs for dinner, plus a smattering of snacks like grape tomatoes, an ounce of cheese, or a piece of dark chocolate. And at least 64 ounces of water (including Vitaminwater Zero and peppermint tea).

With my eating habits, I’m developing the kind of discipline I would really like in other parts of my life. Now I just need to bring that same kind of regularity to exercise.

Got a nice little celebratory screen grab when I posted my weight loss this morning. Looking forward to more.