The Fluffbucket Diaries

And now, the 12-year-old’s contest entry in the latest contest on the DragonVale subreddit. (I post them on her behalf.)

Today was an unfortunate reminder that job cuts aren’t confined to the news industry.

Grateful that I still have a job, but it’s always a gut punch when a colleague is let go.

Farhad Manjoo on the effect of Trump’s Twitter presence (and subsequent ban): “The Pew Research Center reported this week that while the 116th Congress barely passed any substantive bills, its members collectively set records for their activity on Twitter. That dismal fact has to be seen as a legacy of Trump’s tweets — lawmaking, now, is more a matter of going viral than getting anything done.”

Just learned this morning that another cousin has died. Don’t know whether Eric’s death is COVID-related; he had had a severe stroke in 2019 and had been in a nursing home since then.

This is the third death in the past two months among my extended family. (An “uncle,” who was actually my mom’s cousin, died after a long illness – cancer, I think – earlier this month.) It’s all at once sobering and alarming.

Down another 3 pounds. Trying not to be disappointed after the previous week’s 6-pound loss.

After experiencing some palpitations early last week, I connected with the doctor and he has me going every other day on the phentermine. He says it takes a while for the body to get acclimated to that medication. Meanwhile, no problems on the diuretic.

I measure my blood pressure most days; it generally ranges from 150/80 to maybe 130/80, though I’ve seen it go down to 110/82. That stubborn diastolic number is annoying.

All in all, the low-carb approach has been livable. Lots and lots of salads, which is fine by me.

The exercise thing is taking a while for me to work into my day; this is more laziness on my part, though halfway through a short indoor walking video today, my back reminded me why I prefer chair workouts for now. And I’m trying to find ways to get more steps around the house. Not easy, but the steps add up after a while. It doesn’t help that the MyFitnessPal app, which I use to track my food intake and exercise, doesn’t always sync well with the Fitbit.

Sigh. It’s a long slog ahead.

There is definitely a distinction between being “nice” and being “kind,” as this Lifehacker piece notes:

Think of kindness as the act that accompanies (or replaces) your words. It’s silently helping a struggling mom of three kids unload her groceries into her trunk, rather than smiling and saying, “You’re doing a great job, mama,” as you breeze past. It’s bringing a pot of soup to your sick friend, rather than sighing sympathetically and saying you hope they feel better soon. You’re kind if you shovel your neighbor’s car out from under a pile of snow, stop to help a stranger change a tire, or pause to give an obviously lost person some directions—even if you’re not the type of person to bother saying “Bless you,” when someone else sneezes.

Over the weekend, I deleted my fourth Doomscrolling list of political Twitter accounts. I get why people might continue the outrage parade after the Biden inauguration, but I just don’t have the energy to watch it anymore.

Meanwhile, the Washington Post’s Jennifer Rubin lists 50 things that are better already, and reading it took my blood pressure down a few notches this morning.

In memory of Larry King and his late, lamented weekly newspaper column of random thoughts, boldfaced celebrities, and sometimes ridiculous nonsequiturs, I’m directing my stream of consciousness here and spitting a bunch of ellipses into it. Maybe it’ll be a regular thing, maybe not.

“It Is Well With My Soul” is one of my favorite hymns. I wish Catholic churches worked it into Masses. … The Anglican tradition is so superior to modern Catholic worship practice when it comes to hymnody. … Cardinal Cupich and Bp. Barron had excellent homilies today. … Can the rad-trad crowd please stop picking on Pope Francis?

Took my first Advil (or, in this case, an Advil Dual Action pill with ibuprofen and acetaminophen in it) in almost a week. Trying to avoid taking ibuprofen because I suspect it helps spike my blood pressure. … Trying to think of ways to have an avocado a day. … The keto crowd appears to have all the avocado recipes I could want. But it feels like a cult, and it annoys me. … What’s the Dalai Lama up to these days? … That old Fitbit I dredged up is working, but it doesn’t hold a charge for more than a day. I may need to get a new one.

The Tabernacle Choir has become part of my Sundays. Their weekly “Music and the Spoken Word” program gives me background music and a fine nonsectarian message while I write. … The Temple Square organ concerts are great, too. … I’ve always had a soft spot in my heart for the Mormons, even though they won’t call themselves “Mormons” anymore. … Gladys Knight, Steve Young, and Ken Jennings are my favorite Mormons. Oh, and that “Napoleon Dynamite” guy.

I’m obsessed with my Vitamin D, potassium, and magnesium levels. I use supplements to help my Vitamin D and magnesium needs, but apparently potassium supplements need to be used with caution. … Since the king of all potassium-rich foods, the banana, is a nonstarter in my new low-carb life, I’m looking at new sources of potassium. Best bets for me: spinach, yogurt, kefir, and avocados. … I kind of miss Herb Caen.

Speaking of San Francisco, I disagree with Kamala Harris on a bunch of things, but I truly like her. … Deleted my fourth “Doomscrolling” list from Twitter this weekend. … Wonder how long the PTSD will last after 4 years of the last administration. … It’s nice to have a regular churchgoer in the White House again. … Fran Lebowitz is my spirit animal.

I suppose I should be watching the NFC and AFC championship games. I’m not. … Not as much of a Blackhawks fan since they fired Joel Quenneville. … Last I checked, no one had nailed down a date when White Sox pitchers and catchers report. Anybody know? … Good lord, the keto cult annoys me. … I need to send Philip Rivers a thank-you note now that he’s retired.

Sadly, There’s no archive of King’s old “King’s Things” column. Jim Caple at ESPN created a long-ago tribute to it that refreshed my memories of those bizarre clusters of brain nuggets.

A longtime political aide to Jerry Brown, on how Joe Biden’s job ahead reflects what the former two-time California governor accomplished: “(Brown) didn’t have the millennial-ish urge to have everyone watch his every breath and every motion. It was refreshing in California, and it’s going to be incredibly refreshing for a fully exhausted country.”

This CNN piece – "‘Fat but fit’ is a myth when it comes to heart health, new study shows" – illustrates why I’ve turned to a doctor this month to help me begin losing weight.

To be clear, I’m all about body acceptance and all that. But I’m tired of the chronic pain and other health problems that clearly stem from my excess weight. The COVID-19 susceptibility was the tipping point.

God willing, I’m in it for the long haul,

I do enjoy the social media memory stuff.

Unearthed the Fitbit that Chris gave me for Christmas three or four years ago. Had to update the firmware and recharge it for a while, but it’s still working!

Somehow I didn’t have J-Lo singing Woody Guthrie on my Inauguration Day bingo card.

If you sent a holiday package and you know it arrived at its destination, but the recipient doesn’t acknowledge it, should you ask the recipient about it?

Outside the pope and God himself, I don’t know if anybody really has the right to call anyone a “bad Catholic.” (That said, I am the first person to call myself one.) But Fr. Whitfield makes some very good points in his piece:

Biden, undoubtedly, represents a highly educated but poorly catechized, barely converted, cultural Catholicism, formed quite nobly but equally vaguely by a faint account of social justice but which is as substantially Catholic as having once gone to parochial school or Notre Dame. Which is to say, very little. Yet it is a bad Catholicism that differs from another bad Catholicism, a religion itself deformed, principally economically. These, of course, are the bad Catholics of the political right, but who didn’t win. …

… as we welcome this new president, we shouldn’t make much of his Catholicism. Biden shouldn’t make much of it himself; but instead, like me and his fellow bad Catholics, work out his own salvation in fear and trembling. It’s also why Catholics must resist the cheap identarian pride of having a co-religionist in the Oval Office. That, and because the religious veneration of politicians always deforms the venerators. Of this we have had enough.

I am definitely to the right of Biden on the abortion issue. (I’m not sure what Fr. Whitfield is talking about when he mentions Biden’s “willful refusal to embrace the integral moral vision Catholicism describes,” but I’m willing to find out and explore what that means.) I wish he didn’t feel the need to ditch what had once been a clearer-cut opposition to abortion for the sake of political viability.

That said, I appreciate the breath of fresh air that is Biden’s clearly deep and sincere faith, however “poorly catechized” it might be. (I cringed when he mused at tonight’s COVID-19 memorial about “if there are angels in heaven.” A lame, tossed-off line, probably, but still.)

If I agree with Fr. Whitfield on anything, it’s the point about resisting “cheap identarian pride” – something that I am guilty of in recent weeks – about having a fellow Catholic in office. It’s that kind of ideological and allegedly faith-based pride that fueled the Trump train for years. ("Baby Christian," my ass.) If we’re looking for role models to emulate, best to look to the saints and not, say, politicians.

One thing that improves with age: the ability to say “whatever” when things get stressful or annoying.

The Washington Post (always worth the subscription!) has a great list of suggestions for decompressing without doomscrolling.

I’ve made a list for myself. Feel free to join me.

• Watch the Fran Lebowitz/Martin Scorese collaboration “Pretend It’s a City” on Netflix. (So far, it feels like a one-woman old-school Woody Allen movie, without Woody Allen’s creepiness.)
• Write a letter, note, or postcard to a friend or anybody else who could use encouragement or a bright spot in their day and drop it in the mail.
• Do a quickie chair workout.
• Read the Gospel reading from the day’s Mass.
• Pray a Rosary or Divine Mercy chaplet.
• Catch up on one of my several journals/datebooks.
• Collect low-carb baking recipes and actually try one.
• Breathe.

I’ve also been binging lately on “Big Bang Theory” clips on YouTube, but I’ve kind of hit a wall on those.

Until we find a decent slipcover, a blanket is draped over the new recliner to keep the large dog from disemboweling it the way he did the old sofa.

Fortunately, the blanket protected the chair from the detritus of a hard-boiled egg stolen from the kitchen table and subsequently vomited up by the aforementioned large dog.

I unfollow and mute on social media when following certain people makes me feel more like a terrible parent than I already know I am, especially lately.

Tucking away this article in hopes that I can undo some of my pandemic mistakes with my kid.

Dropped off two greeting cards and 8-10 postcards at the post office today.

I was up till 2 a.m. finishing up the outgoing mail. I’m a little groggy even as I write this at 5 p.m., but it was worth it.

My kid’s dog should not make me want to be more of a cat person.

At least I know where the hard-boiled egg I left on the kitchen table went. The yolk-yellow dog vomit confirmed it.

It’s been a week since my first visit with the bariatric doctor: a week of carb limits, new meds, and scrambling to find bread and cracker recipes that won’t kill me.

I’ve lost 6 pounds. At least 74 more to go.

So, here’s the gist of my doctor’s weight loss prescription:

• 100 grams of carbs per day
• 15 to 30 minutes of activity a day (on top of ultimately 10,000 steps daily)
• low doses of phentermine (appetite suppressant) and hydrochlorothiazide (diuretic)
• 3 to 4 cups of fruits/vegetables daily
• 64 ounces of water daily
• “Don’t drink your fruits” (or, presumably, vegetables)
• MyFitnessPal to log food intake

I’m failing miserably at the activity part. I did discover chair workouts to do during work breaks late last week; the one I actually pulled off – a whopping 10-minute session – left me achy and winded the next couple of days. But I intend to keep trying.

Although I’m barely meeting the water and fruits/vegetables goals, I’m doing okay with the carbs thing. Limiting my carbs is more of an issue with Chris' dinner planning than anything else, especially on my meatless Fridays. (He generally dislikes fish, except for sushi and some salmon.)

The doctor said it’s not the quantity of food I’ve been consuming that’s the main problem; it’s what I’ve been eating that’s the problem. I’ve been carb-heavy – lots of breads, chips, and sweets – and drinking juices rather than the healthier approach of eating fruits and vegetables. I confess I didn’t grasp a lot of what he said, but he talked a lot about blood sugar spiking and insulin and fast carbs. And he got into sleep quality and how my suspected apnea issues may be complicating my weight issues and ultimately my overall health.

It’s only been a week, and the road ahead remains overwhelming. I have an awful lot to learn about how all of this works. But I still think this is the right way to deal with what has been a lifelong weight problem that I can’t afford to continue.

Sometimes, you have to do nice things even though you really don’t want to.

This weekend’s Sunday Mass video from Holy Name Cathedral opened with one of the few contemporary Catholic hymns I actually like: “Here I Am, Lord.”

The hymn reminded me of when I drove 3 hours from Raleigh, North Carolina, to see Mother Teresa speak in 1995. The song was featured after her talk at the Charlotte Coliseum, and I remember weeping throughout.

I was thrilled to find Mother Teresa’s talk on YouTube. I look forward to viewing it again; I confess that I was so absorbed in the moment and the experience of seeing a living saint that I only remember a small handful of snippets from it (namely where she spoke up against abortion and pleaded to give her a child poised to die in a clinic). So delighted to be able to see her speech again and actually listen closely.

Relieved to know that my morning inertia thus far has been validated.